Insanity

Albert Einstein once said “The definition of insanity is doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results”. If you believe he's correct, I am insane. I don't even want to think about all the times I have drank too much and started a fight or argument with someone close to me. I shudder thinking back on so many bad nights and usually try to block those memories out. My drunken frustration has been directed towards a friend or family member a few times, but more often than not it's my BF who gets the negative effects of too many gin & waters. Not only do I wake up feeling physically sick from too much alcohol, but the guilt and embarrassment I feel has a much worse and lasting impact.
I continually ruin great nights or events because too much alcohol is involved, which leads to my inner most thoughts, worries and concerns being shared with people who should probably never hear them, let alone at a bar. Worst of all, because I'm not clear-headed, I am surprised when a BF doesn't want to deal with my shenanigans.
When I'm honest with myself I realize how many relationships have been harmed beyond repair because of the drinks + big night out combination. Maybe I should stop repeatedly doing the same thing if I ever want to see a different outcome.
*Don't worry - nothing serious happened this weekend and I am still in a relationship!