Wednesday, December 16, 2009

Online Dating

The wonders of technology make hundreds of men available to you with the touch of a button. Instead of spending time meeting guys and committing hours and days to getting to know what they're all about, you can quickly weed people out with your index finger. There are obviously negatives about online dating (like the creepos) but if you treat it right it can be a successful and exciting activity.
A couple ground rules that I have developed:
Everyone assumes you're chatting with multiple people at once - the guy you're chatting with is, and you should be too.
You don't have to share your life story with everyone you chat with. Keep things light and keep track who you tell what to. Maintain a list if you need to, or better yet, maintain a standard 'story' that you share with everyone, maybe the basic details of your life, and don't move past that until the relationship progresses.
Let the guy lead the way. Sure it's cool to contact someone you find attractive or interesting, but let them send the majority of messages and initiate the conversation. I know I sound like an advice columnist from 1962, but this again will keep it easier to remember who is who while you're talking to a few guys, and makes sure you know who is really interested.
Don't get too involved after a few conversations - meet up, get to know them, have many many phone conversations before moving forward.
Cast your net wide - this is your chance to meet people you wouldn't encounter in 'normal' life, or you might not normally be attracted to. Spending 5 minutes on a conversation with someone who doesn't work out is a lot different than suffering through dinner and a movie.
I'm obviously no expert, but we have many options for dating, especially when we compare to the methods our moms and grandmas were forced to use. With the increase of technology we also have to deal with the negatives - sketchy guys, increased competition, reliance on technology and 'fake' relationships. But if you know how to play the game, I'm confident you'll have a full calendar and an over-flowing inbox.

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