Subway Commute

Let me set the scene: You're sitting on the TTC subway during rush hour, and a man enters the car to stand right in front of you, holding the bar overhead. Have you ever noticed that your face is basically 2 inches away from his crotch? Yikes. When I looked up from my book the other day to find, well, a man's crotch, things definitely got a bit awkward. My daily commute hasn't been the same since.

I Miss My Mom

With Mother's Day coming up, ads are everywhere for things to do with or for your mom on her special day. Although my mom isn't much into spa treatments or shopping sprees, it makes me sad all the same that I will be apart from her this Sunday. The sappy commercials and print ads make me reminisce about fun times we've had, and how it seems a bit ridiculous to live apart from family when you miss them this much.
Anyway...I digress...If you will be seeing your mom on Sunday, be sure to give her a big hug and tell her how important she is. We don't often make a point of saying these things (or writing them in cards which is obviously a bit less awkward) and it really is so important.
If, like me, your mom is in another city, don't forget to phone her on Sunday morning, and a card or flowers is always a nice touch!

That's My Thing

Sometimes we do stupid things. Things like getting drunk and losing it on friends, hooking up with sketchos, and dating guys who just don't treat us that great. Dumb decisions are made as part of normal life, and hopefully it doesn't become a common occurrence. But when your friends come to expect that you will go home with the first shadester who buys you a Tequila shot, or your new BF forgets your bday, just like the last three BFs, there may be a problem.
All too often, instead of facing the facts and considering why you might be putting yourself into these bad, often harmful, situation, girls write it off by saying 'that's my thing'. As if hooking up with strangers or having an eternally disappointing relationship are schticks to be proud of. Instead of letting things become a habit, make it a one-time mistake and leave it at that! I'm sure you can think of many things you'd rather be famous for!

BF with a GF

The considerable appeal of boys with girlfriends has been a mystery for (I assume) all of time. Of course there is the opinion that commitment-phobe girls enjoy the challenge and excitement of spending time with a boy who is already committed, thus avoiding any future pressure. I believe this may be true early on in some relationships, but as we all know, most girls become attached at some point and subsequently are disappointed.
Another common theory, and the one I support, is that a guy is instantly ten times hotter and higher up on the 'what a catch' ladder when we learn he has a GF. It's the thought that 'some other girl likes him, maybe I should too'. Plus, he's technically 'unavailable'. When I think about several guys I've gotten to know who have had GF's and tried to work it that they had me too, I wonder why I put up with it. Although I hate to admit it, there's a certain thrill and confidence boost in being 'the other woman' (for the record I have never been the accomplice to a cheating boy). It's almost more flattering than getting hit on in normal circumstances, as he is choosing you over someone else.
I do believe that deep down most girls expect or hope for the guy to leave their GF for them. Why a girl would ever want a guy like that for their BF I have no idea, but I'm sure a lot of it is the thrill of the chase. The problem is, most girls are setting themselves up not only for major disappointment, but for a crappy fake relationship along the way. Give yourself what you deserve - a full time BF or nothing at all. I am positive that your own company is 100 times better than the company of a dirty dog.

Sloppiness

We all like to party - me as much as the next girl. We also all like to look great, be polished, and have our act together. Too often, these things do not go together. Sure, there are occasions that call for sloppy drunkenness - this weekend may be one for me. Whether these are sporting events or big celebrations, they're a normal (and fun) part of life. However, for the remaining (many) weeks of the year, partying with some self-control is key to being a sexy girl.
Drunk girls are not hot, they're just easy targets. Think of those nights you've been out and stayed sober - are you jealous of that girl next to you at the bathroom sink, with mascara under her eyes, her shirt 2 inches too low, as she stumbles to the hand dryer with toilet paper stuck to her stiletto? Probably not so hot.

Not to mention, all the other downsides of extreme drunkenness:

• If you do meet someone worth chatting up, chances are you won't be able to converse in a way that portrays just how fabulous and fun you are.
• There's a 90% chance you'll get overly emotional and end the night by crying and/or saying regrettable things to those with you and reachable by cell phone.
• All that effort you put into getting ready for the bar is wasted - your hair is now a rat's nest, your makeup is on every part of your face EXCEPT your eyelids, and your shoes are in your hands.

When you see things my way, maybe next time you'll think about switching up your 7th G&T for a water.

It's How I Am

Warning - the following might be seen as being a bit harsh. And as I re-read it I realize it's very similar to "That's my thing". I think there are some key differences though, so please read both!
We all make mistakes - no matter who you are, how hard you work at leading a healthy, happy life, things go wrong. For you, this may mean drinking too much at a club and having a less-than-graceful exit, getting in a fight with a close friend, or falling for someone who just isn't that into you. The problem is with how you react to these situations. Since when is it OK to say "well, that's just how I am"? I hear this so often, as if it's an excuse for sloppiness, mean behaviour or poor judgement. Making mistakes is a natural part of life, and can even be positive, when you learn from them. Writing it off as a mere personality flaw, not so positive.
Next time you're recovering from a big night out with a bad ending, or a hurtful relationship, force yourself to think about how you can avoid doing the same thing next week/month/year. Make a change, or get comfortable with being disappointed in yourself.

Girl Friends

Sometimes I meet girls through other friends, work, or volunteering, and I want to get to know them better, or hang out with them again. I find it awkward though, and I don't think I'm alone in this. Sometimes it's just as scary to ask a girl for her email or phone number as it is a guy, and I mean this in a totally straight way. When you really hit it off with a girl, in a platonic, 'this girl is cool and would be fun to party with' kind of way, why not end the night by asking her for an email so you can hang out again? At least Facebook is so common that it's relatively un-creepy to add someone the next day, but it can still prove to be a difficult situation. A common in-my-head discussion as I leave one of these situations sounds like this; 'Did I come on too strong? Did she think I was cool? Did she enjoy our convo about sketchy guys as much as I did? Would it be weird if we hung out just the two of us?'.
Why do girls freak out about this so much? First of all, I don't want to be mistaken for having romantic interests. I have nothing against lesbians, but I'm not one. Secondly, I don't want to seem pathetic or desperate. It's almost like I want all other women to believe I have an amazing social life and do not need their friendship. Yikes.
I have (mostly) gotten over my self-consciousness, and if I really enjoy my time with someone I make an effort to stay in contact. Most women I know are flattered when someone new wants to hang with them or include them in their circle. For me, meeting new friends means exposure to new restaurants, bars, shopping and activities. And I guess if a women can't pick up on the fact that I'm straight from my many random dating stories, then there's a bigger problem at hand.