Mixing Success!

I hosted my first singles mixer on Friday night, and I'm happy to say it was a success! Thank you to everyone who came out, and especially to those of you who invited friends! I'm not sure how many love connections were made, but there was definite flirting, chatting and excitement throughout the night. I received several follow-up messages since the event, asking about "that tall guy" or "that cute girl" so I'll do my best to re-unite the interested singles.

I'm really excited about hosting some future events, but here is what I've learned to make things better going forward:

• There were a lot of tables and chairs at the venue, which lead to people sitting in one spot, rather than moving around meeting new people. I think sitting is fine (2-3 hours of standing is a lot after all) but it meant that you were stuck speaking with whoever sat down beside you.
• Next time I'd have some free drinks available. While it was nice that there was limited sloppiness, free-flowing alcohol would have loosened people up more.
• While I was worried that people would stick with their friends and be hesitant to mingle, I was (thankfully) proven wrong. For the most part, people spoke with whoever was nearby, and clearly came out with the intention of meeting new people. I hope this resulted in new friendships, if not love connections.

Next up: sports-themed events...think curling, Jays games, pool. For those of you who are less athletically-inclined, don't fret - these will all be sports where beer is the main focus!

Is This Your Stop?

Nearly every day this winter I've seen at least one attractive young guy while riding the subway in the morning. I have wanted to approach them - not always for me but maybe for one of my friends - but I'm not sure how. I've made eye contact over a few stops but let's be honest - someone has to be pretty brave to approach a stranger on a crowded subway. Not to mention that every stop brings the possibility that your crush is going to get off: it's not like we all wear signs announcing that we're exiting at St. Andrew's so they only have two stops left to make a move!
I've come up with a few possible ways to break the ice or initiate a conversation but I'm not sure I'll be trying any of them out soon.

• Accidentally fall into them when there's an abrupt stop
• Sit beside them and ask them to hold something for a moment as you kerfuffle with your giant purse
• If you exit the train at the same time, strike up a conversation as you're exiting the station
• Make fun of someone else on the train. I know that's not very friendly, but there are always an array of amusing people and rolling your eyes with someone can be a bonding experience!

My last resort is making up cards that say "you're hot, come to my mixer next month" so I better come up with some better conversation starters, stat!

Coffee Date

There are an unusually large number of young, attractive, potentially available people at downtown Starbucks throughout a day. I'm sure this is why so many people in Toronto go there to "read" or "write". The turnover is also so quick that you could find yourself sharing a table with several attractive men in the span of an hour.

I always hear stories of people meeting a cute stranger at Starbucks. The other day I spent an hour at a downtown location waiting to meet a friend, and a cute guy sat in the comfy chair across from me. Although a few furtive glances were exchanged we continued focusing on our respective activities until he left 20 minutes later.

It got me wondering - how do you make the move to start talking with a stranger? Gone are the days of asking for the time (I had my phone in my hand) and I don't smoke so no asking for a light outside. The chairs were spaced quite far apart so although we could have made great eye contact, we would have been near yelling to hear each other. In the past I have commented on a guy's book if it's something I recognize, but in this case I don't know how to pronounce Sudoku, let alone complete one.

I guess I'll have to work on my small talk, develop some questions about the 'area' (could I ask for directions?) and improve my eyelash batting. Yes, maybe that will work.

Nothing Like It...

I swear there is nothing like a solid patio night with a close girlfriend, or girlfriends. I just had a good 4 hour-long catch up, wine-drinking, chat session with a friend of mine, and I feel fabulous. Maybe it's the house white talking, but spending a few hours outside, in the sun, with a great girl is something that just can't be compared to. There's no eye-rolling, annoyed feeling that seems to be inevitable when you're out with a guy. There's no first-date pressure or awkwardness. And you can gossip about all the passing guys and girls to your heart's content. Don't forget about your girlfriends - no matter what your marital status/dating situation/mood...it's so important to have some quality girl time in your life. The older I get the more that means a few hours on a patio, and less hours in a club.

Welcome to T-dot

A friend of a friend (so a new friend of mine) is moving to Toronto this weekend, and I've offered to help her get settled in the city, introduce her to some friends, and basically try to make the transition as painless as possible. She reminds me a lot of me when I moved here almost 3 years ago, so I guess I want to help her avoid some of the bad things I encountered, while experiencing the same good things I did.
My first goal is to ensure she has lots to do, on this, her first weekend in the city (and first weekend before starting her new job). When I moved here I stayed with a friend, who was great at introducing me to his friends, taking me out, and putting in a full effort to making me feel welcome. The second thing is learning the ropes, and getting through the day-to-day deets of a new city. When I moved here, my friend's (and my temporary) roomie took me on a tour of the city, to teach me how to get to work, where the good shopping, stores, and practical necessities were. So I'm going to be that person for my new friend. What girl doesn't need to learn the closest Shopper's, prime indoor and outdoor shopping, fun patios, and safe areas for a walk/run?
I think it's important to pay it forward, as the movie taught us (well I didn't actually ever see that movie but I imagine that was the point). If I hadn't had the great support of a few key people when I first moved here, I may very well have returned home one month later. Who really knows for sure, but what I do know is that I avoided sobbing into my pillow, late-night hysterical phone calls to my parents, and any sort of regrets, mainly due to those people.