Public Displays of Affection seem to be an chat-worthy subject for most people. I've discussed the merits of PDAs, heard many complaints about them, experienced it myself, and witnessed many many examples of it in all parts of the world, with people of all ages. Women seem to be the most passionate about PDAs and have varied and strong views on what is and isn't acceptable.
Those of you who have spent time with my BF and me know that we're quite affectionate in public, something which was very NOT me a few years ago. I blame a lot of it on him and his culture and background, where families cheek kiss every time they enter a room! Regardless of the reasons, I have come to love this added touching and affection in my life - I think people were meant to hug and touch (I'm talking G rated touching here...) when they care about each other. However, I know that a lot of people don't feel this way, and are especially put off by PDAs.
I've spent time trying to figure out what it is exactly that bothers people about PDAs. Sure - if the couple is getting very graphic it's just downright get-a-room uncomfortable to witness. But what's the harm in a few small kisses or some hand-holding? Do I dare think that people are just jealous? I can understand this if you're in a tough drought or more importantly going through/recovering from a particularly hard break-up - definitely hard to watch a happy couple together. Or do people in Canada really just dislike touching in general and think it's unnecessary outside of the bedroom/couch?
I have had my feelings hurt a few times when people have made comments about my BF kissing me in public, and to be honest, when we first began dating I was a bit embarrassed by it too. I see people giving other affectionate couples the evil eye all pretty much everyday, and I feel bad for them (and smile at how happy the couple is). I would have hoped that friends out there would be happier for their girl being with a nice guy who's willing to show how much he cares about them, rather than visually show their frustration. If it's really a problem, please let the PDA-ers know, but maybe spend a minute asking yourself why it's really such a bother to you.
I'm totally open to comments on this post - I know there are more than a few people out there who probably do not agree me.
Oh great post, asking for the controversial comments. My opinion on this is two fold. As someone who is experiencing a heavy drought in the boyfriend department, I find comfort in the fact that couples display their affection publicly and especially when it is the guy doing it because I think it shows how much he loves his girlfriend and wants to share it with the world. I love to hope thati'll get to do that soon too (within reason anyway). Now by this I mean the affection of holding hands or even just being lovey dovey cute but not make you want to throw up in your mouth (and swallow it). I think I definitely do get jealous sometimes but hope i'm not one of those people that stares others down. Lately i've been trying to tell myself it's really not my place to judge anyone and the last thing I should do is be jealous of someone's elses happiness...especially a stranger.
ReplyDeleteFrom someone that's been in a relationship for 8 years and is about to get married, I think I'm pretty low key with PDAs compared to others I know, but if it's hand-holding and occasional smooches, I think it's sweet. Don't get me wrong - when I see couples full on making out on the subway I want to vomit. But as long as it's done tastefully and not raunchy, I think it's sweet and something that onlookers should appreciate as witnessing love :)
ReplyDeleteHey Dani, great post. I think PDA's are for the most part awesome(even some of the raunchy encounters I have witnessed more so in Europe, were still quite awesome and I don't mean that in a creaper kind of way.) I think there is a big difference when you watch two people who you can tell don't have much chemistry vs. those couples who enact the very defintion of love that so many of us try too hard to put words to. As a reccent 'drought' expert I can say that holding hands and even just having someone put an arm around you goes far beyond the comfort you need when you are feeling down it becomes almost addictive. I think PDA's are beautiful and people in love should not have to control their urges, and set such restrictions on their affection for one another. Besides its getting colder, everyone should want to snuggle.
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