The other day I had a flashback to a dirty comment made by an ex-BF of several years ago. I'm not sure what prompted the flashback but what was most disturbing was my reaction to the memory. I literally shuddered.
I remember the moment in question clearly - my BF at the time and I were at a movie screening and I was wearing a cute skirt that I was hoping he'd appreciate (I was so eager to please...). As we sat down for the movie he made a comment re: the skirt.
Even at the time I was just embarrassed, more so for him, and I felt really uncomfortable. It did not turn me on at all and in fact had the opposite effect.
This flashback reminded me of two important things. 1) I don't like dirty talk and 2) when a BF makes you shudder it's probably a pretty clear sign that things aren't meant to be.
Saturday, May 22, 2010
Wednesday, May 12, 2010
Doing Things My Way
Our generation has grown up with the idea that it's cool to get married late, you don't need to have kids to be a success and it is totally acceptable to be single after the age of 25. I love this (especially since I totally fit into that demographic) and I think there are some great things about dating in your late twenties and beyond.
Unfortunately the common problem I see with dating at a more mature age (I'm not implying that anyone is old!) is that we're all so set in our ways. I know I'm making it sound like we're 72, but even at 27 I have my own ways of doing things, I know exactly what I like and what I absolutely will not deal with. This can be helpful in narrowing down the search for Mr. Right, but when you're starting out in a new relationship it can mean a lot of butting heads. Simple tasks like washing the dishes, choosing a restaurant and driving to a date can cause major disagreements and a lot of "why are you doing it that way"s. In my mind it's never going to be avoided - we've all been around for 25+ years making our own decisions and trusting that they're the right ones. What's important is that the man you're with respectfully questions you and your actions, in order to learn more about you with no hint of condescension or criticism anywhere nearby.
Unfortunately the common problem I see with dating at a more mature age (I'm not implying that anyone is old!) is that we're all so set in our ways. I know I'm making it sound like we're 72, but even at 27 I have my own ways of doing things, I know exactly what I like and what I absolutely will not deal with. This can be helpful in narrowing down the search for Mr. Right, but when you're starting out in a new relationship it can mean a lot of butting heads. Simple tasks like washing the dishes, choosing a restaurant and driving to a date can cause major disagreements and a lot of "why are you doing it that way"s. In my mind it's never going to be avoided - we've all been around for 25+ years making our own decisions and trusting that they're the right ones. What's important is that the man you're with respectfully questions you and your actions, in order to learn more about you with no hint of condescension or criticism anywhere nearby.
Monday, May 3, 2010
It's Been Awhile...and Random Thoughts
I haven't posted forever...I'm sure that you're all heartbroken after missing my random stories and dating advice for an entire month! Things have been busy, and maybe I just haven't been as dating-crazy as usual? Wow something must be wrong!
I'm back at it and May has brought on some new goals - think of it as a New Year's Reso beginning May 1st as opposed to January 1st.
I'm officially training to run my second half-marathon in June, and I've decided to actually train in order to a) avoid major embarrassment and b) avoid any sort of heart failure along the route.
I'm working my hardest to cook more, bring my lunch to work and eat healthy snacks...I'm even cooking now as I write!
I have two trips and one (important!) visitor this month, and I'm going to do all I can to fully enjoy it all. It's going to be busy, and stressful, but I know it will all be a great time!
I'm really working on slowing down, taking deep breaths, and enjoying every day. Sometimes I find that I've been barely breathed for several minutes or that I'm rushing when I don't need to. No more!
Random thoughts, but I feel that by listing my goals here, I have several people holding me accountable!
I'm back at it and May has brought on some new goals - think of it as a New Year's Reso beginning May 1st as opposed to January 1st.
I'm officially training to run my second half-marathon in June, and I've decided to actually train in order to a) avoid major embarrassment and b) avoid any sort of heart failure along the route.
I'm working my hardest to cook more, bring my lunch to work and eat healthy snacks...I'm even cooking now as I write!
I have two trips and one (important!) visitor this month, and I'm going to do all I can to fully enjoy it all. It's going to be busy, and stressful, but I know it will all be a great time!
I'm really working on slowing down, taking deep breaths, and enjoying every day. Sometimes I find that I've been barely breathed for several minutes or that I'm rushing when I don't need to. No more!
Random thoughts, but I feel that by listing my goals here, I have several people holding me accountable!
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